HBO’s Succession

Nutshell: HBO, Drama, 2 seasons, 10 episodes each, husband approved, life styles of the rich and famous meets Empire sprinkled with a little awkward the Office humor.

CB Rating: 9.3

Is this show worth watching? Let’s put it this way, I have been walking around practicing my Scottish accent just so I could correctly imitate Logan Roy’s poetic “fuck off”. Who is Logan Roy you may be asking? He is the main character, whom you hate while simultaneously really want him to like you. This show is excellent.

I started watching a little after the second season began.  I was told by countless serious TV people (yes this is a standard) that it was a must see.  They did not disappoint. Even Bobby [husband] got in on this one. 

It’s a story about a Rupert Murdoch-esque family facing the question of who will take over for dad and run this billion dollar media company when it’s time to step down (Classic!).  

The premise may not sound as sexy as a blonde mother of dragons losing her power hungry-mind and burning down cities only to be stopped by her bastard lover.  BUT I found myself pacing during a board room scene. I am telling you, pacing like I was watching The Battle of the Bastards.  

This show has everything you could want.  It has family drama, a peak into how the insanely wealthy live, weird sex stuff, some pretty stellar awkward humor, and a theme song that is so epic it has spun off multiple samples and internet remixes {check some of those out HERE}.

If you disagree, 

Good Omens

Nutshell: Amazon. 6 Episodes. Michael Sheen, dark satire, hilarious and so smart. If you are easily offended (particularly over religion) don’t watch it, but you would be missing out.

CB Rating: 8.9

Based on the book “The Nice and Accurate Prophecies of Agnes Nutter, Witch”, (written by Neil Gaiman and Terry Pratchett) the show starts modern day with the demon Crowley (David Tennant) and the angel Aziraphale (Michael Sheen), who have been friends, literally since the beginning of time. You see they met at the beginning of life on Earth and were sent here to be the eyes on the ground for their respective sides. They start to grow accustomed to life on Earth, and therefore want to stop Armageddon instead of pushing it forward as they were assigned to do.

With so many obstacles and characters in their way. This show is brilliant. The premise is genius, and the acting from Michael Sheen, David Tennant and special appearances by John Hamm and others takes it over the top.

Watch it on: Amazon Prime

Starting: Michael Sheen, David Tennant, John Hamm

Trailer: Click HERE

Murder Mystery- Killed Me

Nutshell: Netflix.  Jen Aniston.  Adam Sandler. Rachel Green. Billy Madison.  Murder Mystery.  Dark Comedy.  Light and Hilarious.  Good for everyone.  1 hour and 37 minutes.

CB Rating: 8.2

Murder Mystery killed me, get it (I’m hilarious).  Netflix has taken out the big guns.  They pulled in the late 90’s rom-com dream team, Jennifer Aniston and Adam Sandler and brought us a ridiculous play on the classic murder mystery.  

I had already seen these two together in Just Go With It, (which for those who haven’t seen it- low key hilarious) so I knew what they were capable of.  The storyline had me feeling a little iffy about it:

“On a long-awaited trip to Europe, a New York City cop and his hairdresser wife scramble to solve a baffling murder aboard a billionaire’s yacht”

Right? It sounds a little cliche, and a little been there done that.  I mean even Saved By the Bell had a murder mystery episode.   What it leaves out is how hard they go into the genre. It’s like they took the game Clue, multiplied it to the point of absurdity- and it really works.  The characters are stereotypical and ludicrous. The story keeps moving and Jen {I can call her that} and Sandler just hit it out of the park.

It’s a great one to put on when you want to unwind and laugh for an hour and a half.  

Watch it on Netflix

Starring: Jennifer Aniston and Adam Sandler

Written By: James Vanderbilt

Trailer: Click HERE

A Million Little Things

Nutshell: Worth Watching.  1 hour. Cable Drama.  Solid cast. Semi-predictable.  Still enjoyable.  Mystery.

My original prediction from the newsletter when it first aired:

A Million Little Things: The life of a group of friends post one of their friends taking his life.  It’s just as sad as it sounds.  I feel like it’s ABC’s answer to This is Us only with an even more depressing plot if possible.  Look people liked this one, and there is something that happens in the Pilot that kind of traps you into the next one.  This show will either surprise everyone and be incredible or be the absolute biggest piece of shit ever. #tbd #stillgoingtowatch (ABC and Hulu)

I really thought this show was going to be the biggest turd.  How could ABC successfully pull off an almost tit for tat of This Is Us? They did it.  Something about Ron Livingston that I love to hate.  Is it that he broke up with Carrie on a post-it? Definitely.

Here Ron plays a guy named Jonathan Dixon, who has just taken his life.  The show centers around his widow, family and group of friends as they deal with the impossible.   Sounds completely and utterly predictable.  There are moments that are.  However the cast is great, and the stories kind of grab you.  It’s in the same category as The Parenthood and This Is Us.

The show got such good traction and reviews, ABC even gave it a better day and time slot as it will air on Thursdays, 9 PM starting in September.  Catch up on Hulu.

Cast: Ron Livingston (Office Space, Sex and the City [eyeroll]), Romany Malco (40 Year Old Virgin, Weeds), Stephanie Szostack (Devil Wears Prada), and more unfamiliar but lovable faces

Trailer: Click HERE

What If (Netflix) The Plot Twist From Hell

Nutshell: Netlfix.  1 Hour Episodes.  Drama.  Holy Renee Zellweger.  Don’t recommend to all or most.

This show had all the right parts.  A frozen faced Renee Wellger, a hot dude, a likable main actress and a seemingly sexy plot.  For those who didn’t catch the preview that Netflix was literally shoving down your throat, it’s about a rich powerful woman, Anne (Renee), offering an ungodly amount of money for one night with Lisa’s husband, Sean (token hot guy).

If it all sounds familiar, it’s because it does.  We have all seen how this plays out, because we all saw Indecent Proposal.  However there was an unexpected twist- that honestly flopped.  It’s not worth watching the entire season to get to it.  However if you’re like me, you will anyway.  It has that right amount of drama and trashy intrigue that is hard to resist.  You were warned.

Starring: Renee Zellweger, Jane Levy, Blake Jenner

Trailer: Click HERE

 

Friends From College

Nutshell: Good time killer.  Great cast.  BingeableAF. A little drama but hilarious.  Fred Savage is the man.  Under 30 minute episodes.  2 Seasons.  Good for everyone. Cancelled by Netflix (unfortunate)

This show took me totally by surprise.  It’s hard for me to explain why because with Keegan-Michael Key and Cobie Smulders as two of the the leads, I should have expected it to be funny.  I guess what I didn’t expect was how much I would die for Fred Savage.  That guy stole the show and helped keep it light through (for lack of a better word) a pretty fucked up friend situation.

The second season premiered in January 2019, and was apparently cancelled by Netflix shortly after in February.  I just found that out as I was writing this article, and I have to say it’s disappointing.  It leaves you hanging.  Uncool.  However the journey is still worth taking.  The ensemble of the characters are enough to carry you through the drama.

The first two seasons are a great binge when you’re looking for something light.  These days with Game of Thrones and The Handmaid’s Tale- we can all agree that light can be good.

Happy binging!

The Handmaid’s Tale Season 2 Finale Rant

This article does contain spoilers

Season 2 of Handmaid’s Tale was grueling. I cried, I cheered, I yelled at the TV, and when June did not get on that truck at the end I literally threw my remote.  For a solid two days I was angry about it.  At one point I  vowed to not watch the next season, because this was bull shit.

Then in a rare move, I calmed down.  I started to come around to the idea of her staying in Gillead.  I started to understand how it would be impossible for any mother to leave a child behind in these circumstances.  But what I finally understood is that maybe June saw hope.  Hear me out.

At the beginning of the season, June is pregnant and living in a Gillead where there is not even a sliver of hope for change.  Getting out is the only way.  She hasn’t seen Hannah in years, and the chances of finding Hannah and getting out of there are slim to none.  But slowly over the course of the season things start to shift.

The revolution is beginning.  There’s an explosion taking out several Generals and Commanders.  Serena, with June’s help, begins writing laws and giving out orders while Commander Waterford is in the hospital.  The wives of the Commanders come together to petition for girls to be able to read.  June is seeing all of these pieces come together over the course of her pregnancy.  So when she arrives at the truck and sees that Emily is also there, and she was escorted by Commander Lawrence, the architect and leader behind Gillead – she knows the tide has turned.  If Lawrence is on their side…  If Serena is on their side…  If the Martha’s can orchestrate such an elaborate “Underground Railroad” escape…  If Nick can stand up to the commander….  Then maybe there IS a way for her to save Hannah and everyone else who is oppressed and imprisoned in Gillead.

I think it’s bad ass.  She could have gotten on the truck and never looked back.  But she’s a mother.  She’s a warrior.  She’s going to light this place on fire. PRAISE BE BITCHES!

Dead to Me

Nutshell: MUST WATCH, 30 minute episodes, Dark Comedy, good for everyone aka not just for the ladies

I am almost positive that loving Christina Applegate is something that all children of the 90’s were programmed for.  It goes hand in hand with our affection for boy bands and the secret Lisa Frank school supplies we have stashed in a box somewhere in our home.

Naturally while browsing Netflix, upon seeing a show starring the first Kelly we ever really cared about (sorry not sorry Kapowski and Taylor), I clicked on it immediately.  Before I knew it I was 4 episodes in and had to force myself to shut it off because it was 2 AM on a Friday and I haven’t been up that late since Carson Daly was on MTV.  Safe to say I finished this series before the weekend was over.

Dead to Me, is a dark comedy centered around Jen (Applegate) who just lost her husband suddenly in a hit and run, and ends up meeting Judy (Linda Cardellini of Freaks and Geeks fame) at a grief group.  The season unfolds around Jen trying to figure out who was behind her husband’s death, as her and Judy learn to deal with their own personal losses and new life.

This is an absolute must watch show.  It may just be my favorite show since I discovered The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel.  I realize these are strong words, and you think it may not live up to the hype but trust me friend, it does.  The show is produced by Will Ferrell and Adam McKay (the people responsible for Anchorman, The Other Guys, and more).

There are so many layers to this show.  The acting is incredible, and this is the perfect time to mention James Marsden (sigh) also has a starring role.  It’s dark but also hilarious, deep but also crude in moments.  The finale left me wanting more.  I am pacing waiting to hear when the next season is announced.

Trailer: Check it out HERE

Aired: May 3, 2019

Netflix

Starting: Christina Applegate, Linda Cardellini, James Marsden

Created By: Liz Feldman (2 Broke Girls)

A Very Netflix Christmas

A lot of things happen after Thanksgiving. Our jeans fit way more snug.  Stores basically go into competition with each other over who can offer us the biggest discount.  Holiday music is now officially everywhere.

TV also takes a hiatus.  All our favorite shows do this new thing called “Fall Finale” and we are left without new episodes.  Cue the Hallmark Channel.  It becomes the premier destination for women everywhere.

But Hallmark is no longer the only show in town.  Something extra special has  come to us this year via Netflix.  The best part?  An endless supply of Christmas Cheese and Romance are at your fingertips.  You don’t have to wait around anymore to see what Hallmark is going showing us.  We get to binge this entire genre without any limitations.  The sky is the limit, people!

Naturally, I tasked myself with scoping out as many of these movies as I could, only so that I could give you a shortcut to the one’s that are worth your time.    I know- I am a so selfless.  Basically a saint.

These movies aren’t written to win awards, or tell a perfectly beautiful story that will be timeless for years to come.  The actors aren’t the best in the business, but they’re all really pretty and get the job done.   We have seen all of these stories before- but that is not why we watch.  We watch for the perfect balance of cheesy drama and pure, unbridled, reach for the stars kind of predictable happiness.

So here it is my breakdown of the “most suggested” Christmas movies now available on Netflix.   Now if anyone needs me- I am somewhere face down humming Mariah’s “All I want for Christmas is You” trying to figure out how to function out in a world that isn’t all whirlwind Christmas romances and life changing coincidence, sigh.

*movies ranked in order from least cheesy to most cheesy and give a score of 0-100 (100 being extremely cheesy, and 0 the least)

Love Actually:  CLASSIC PERFECTION. (Cheese Score:  40%) Since it’s premier in 2003- this movie has defined Christmas.  I don’t think there has ever been a holiday season where I don’t watch it.  It is the bar setter for all other Christmas movies and the perfect opening for this list.  It’s completely predictable, straightforward, awkward, corny, romantic, and has a dancing Hugh Grant.  It is what all Christmas movies aspire to be.  If you have never seen this list… I can’t finish this sentence.  It’s impossible you have all seen this.   Thank you Netflix for bringing it to us this season…

The Holiday Breakup: MOST LIKELY TO HAPPEN IRL. (Cheese Score: 62%) It moves to the top of the list for one main reason- sex.  Because let’s face it- these movies never do! So we see this couple through their entire relationship and not just the first two days where they met and fall madly in love with each other.  I really was expecting a bomb here, and don’t get me wrong it’s still a Christmas romcom but I dug it.  Seems like you know just what will happen here- BUT it takes a twist.

Christmas Inheritance:  BEEN THERE BUT LOVE IT ANYWAY. (Cheese Score: 70%)   We have seen this story before, but so what.  We can’t disqualify our holiday movies this way.  It’s about the journey.  I liked this one.  I mean it was cheesy, but in all the right ways.  It was a heart warmer and only lagged a little towards the end.  I loved the cast, I mean it even has Andie MacDowell and a couple other recognizable faces. What’s not to love?

A Christmas PrinceBottom line: WATCH (CHEESE SCORE 78%)  Undercover reporters, family secrets, a prince charming.  What else do your holiday romance dreams involve? This checks all the boxes.  This movie was such a hit for Netflix last year, it probably spurred a whole new onslaught of cheese to be launched into our streaming universe.  So also, Thank you A Christmas Prince, the gift that keeps on giving.

The Princess SwitchBRING ON THE CHEESE (Cheese Score 84%) It’s almost like this movie combines The Parent Trap with My Best Friend’s Wedding and A Christmas Prince.  A combination like this can only result in one thing- Christmas movie magic.  It’s just the right balance of cheesy and adorable to make it through and walk away happier.

The Christmas Chronicles: SANTA BABY! (CHEESE SCORE 84%) This is a different kind of movie.  It isn’t romantic or cheesy.  Kurt Russell can even make the role of Santa hot.  It’s a heart warming story of a brother and sister bonding on Christmas while interfering in Santa’s deliveries.  Great for the kids- it doesn’t blow our cover for those who are still keeping Santa alive in their home, and actually provides a solid theory for how he makes it happen on Christmas Eve.

The Holiday Calendar. OVERBOARD. (CHEESE SCORE 93%) This one was tough for me to make it through.  I had to walk away a few times.  It seemed too predictable and the acting (even for Christmas movie standards) was truly bad.  However it did get better, and the ending was sweet.

Christmas Wedding Planner. HOLY CHEESE. (CHEESE SCORE 96%). It’s literally the Wedding Planner (think JLo) mixed a little with Rush Hour but set during Christmas and with no Matthew McConaughey or Alex Karev.  Yet somehow it still worked.    Kelly Rutherford brings a very upper east side Lily Van der Woodsen vibe to her role, which I always can appreciate.  The plot is actually terrible, as I am thinking about it right now I realize it’s painful.  However if you can overlook major character flaws and just accept the happy ending- this is for you.  I know I liked it.

Christmas With a View: A PORN WITH NO RELEASE (CHEESE SCORE 110%) Oh man.  I lost count of the number of times I cringed watching this movie.  More than I felt comfortable with for sure.  My friend said it perfectly, it was cheesy like a porno but unfortunately just never got to the porno part.  Failed restauranteur, Clara,  falls in love with reality star chef, Shane in the small Mountain town after about two days.  However in all these movies we have that, why does it seem extra inauthentic in this movie?  Terrible acting? Terrible dialogue? It’s so so hard to tell.  I would say watch this movie just to try and decide for yourself.  Maybe take a shot every time you have to close your eyes out of sheer disbelief.

SW 28: {10.1.18} It’s October!

Welcome to the Twilight Zone

I had an entire intro prepared for you today that got completely side tracked by a comment my father made at dinner last night.

We were discussing all the new pilots we watched that week {this should not be a surprise to you} and the conversation suddenly turned into the funniest sitcoms of all time.  I love a funniest sitcom of all time conversation! As you can imagine we threw out all the obvious contenders Friends, Modern Family, Lucy, Golden Girls, How I Met Your Mother, The Goldbergs, and maybe you have now started to notice that Seinfeld is not on this list.  Seinfeld is on EVERYONE’s top comedy list. Right?

Are you sitting down? My father has unequivocally declared that Seinfeld is not funny.  He even specifically calls out the Soup Nazi as the prime example for “boring”.  My father literally stood up, threw air quotes around “No soup for you” and said “that is absolutely not funny.”

The table gave a resounding “are you FORKING kidding me?” Someone even did an Elaine dancing.  The puffy shirt!

Who was this man? My father?

I was so disenchanted.  You have to understand my father is my first comedy hero.  He can make ANYONE laugh no matter the scenario- if he wants to.  A gift truly.  My father does not like Jerry Seinfeld and do not even get him started on Larry David.  His head almost exploded at the mere mention of Larry’s name.

How can one of my comic heroes, truly despise another one of my comic heroes?  Made me wonder.  If I brought Jerry to have dinner with my family would Jerry think my father was funny?

Then I moved onto a much funnier fantasy that involved locking my dad in a room with Larry David with a TV that only plays The Big Bang Theory (because obviously they both hate that one) and see who makes it out alive.

Seems like everything was absolutely bat shit crazy this last week.  I mean the news cycle was one delusional outlandish thing after the other.  Cover most of the craziest moments below, and included a few other things that give us hope and make us laugh.

xx
Cristina

Breast Cancer Awareness Month 

HOPEFUL NEWS

The aim of Breast Cancer Awareness Month is to raise as much awareness about breast cancer and funds to help people fight it.

In a very brave and beautiful way Serena Williams is helping raise awareness with a new campaign she did in collaboration with the I Touch Myself Project to remind women to put their health first.    She can be seen singing  “I Touch Myself” acapella and topless.  To help spread the word on the importance of women giving themselves a self-exam.

You can check out the Breast Cancer Network Australia

or you can visit the National Breast Cancer Foundation or Susan G. Komen to find out what to look for or make at home or make a donation in the fight against breast cancer.

Shit Was CRAZY this Last Week 

Anyone want a beer?  Too soon to joke? We can all agree that what is happening with the nomination for Supreme Court is disheartening and disturbing for many many reasons.

So thank God for Saturday Night Live.  It’s controversial obviously people are offended- but I think they really sort of nailed it. Click the image for the link.

Lindsay Lohan can Speak Russian and Arabic?  How do I know? So glad you asked! Lindsay was live on her Instagram when she found a family of Syrian (assumed) refugees sleeping on the ground.  Lindsay proceeded to harass this family for 10 minutes, ultimately accusing them of trafficking the children.  Boy was she wrong.  At around the 9:00 mark the mother of these boys literally punches Lindsay in the face. I CANNOT MAKE THIS SHIT UP. Find that HERE.

Love Yourself As Much As Kanye Loves Kanye. Kanye (let the record show he now wants you to refer to him as Ye, but I think it’s ridiculous and will not participate) was the musical guest o SNL over the weekend.  He brought on some of the cast and host, Adam Driver and then well… you can watch HERE The reason this is really striking the wrong cord with, well, everyone besides maybe Donald Trump, is he said the 13th Amendment should be abolished. Later on Twitter he said “amended” but you can see the problem…

I definitely need to increase how much I save monthly.     Elon Mosk stepping down as chairman of Tesla and had to pay a $20 million fine.  Full article HERE. How does one afford a $20 Million fine?!  #hottamale

Some Happy Thoughts

Anyone need a laugh? I know after this shit show I do. Well Buzzfeed is here to serve, here are 14 tweets from the weekend that are just funny. Click HERE.

Ina Garten is out with a new cookbook, Cook Like a Pro! If you don’t absolutely love Ina, it’s because you don’t know her well enough.  I won’t walk that back.  It’s true.  She’s wonderful.  Hugging her is on my bucket list.  Don’t believe me, HERE is a lovely article about her, and it’s lovely because obviously an article about her would have to be.

On a Scale of 1-10 Millie Bobby Brown is an 11.  Ok cheesy very obvious jokes aside, Millie, Millie Bobby (not sure what to call her) took the stage at a Maroon 5 in Nashville in place of our girl, Cardi Cardi, and Millie killed it! Check that HERE. Because any excuse to hear “Girls Like You.”

God Bless My Little Balls!  One of my most favorite Bestie x Besite episodes ever! Jenny Slate and Gabe Liedman try to come up with a new catch phrase.

TV Addict Update  

As we have established, time and time again, I watch too much TV.

What’s on my list to watch next?  I need a new show! What do you got?!
Have a suggestion? Let me know

HERE is a good list c/o Thrillist of suggestions for things you can quickly binge on Netflix if you’re looking for a good binge post Jack Ryan.

Manifest: This show was my favorite pilot of the week.  I came in with high expectations because there was the comparison to Lost, BUT it had a good twist.  I’m intrigued and love the characters.  I would definitely recommend. (find on NBC and Hulu)

Single Parents: I thought there was no chance that Blair Waldorff could be funny- but I was so wrong.  It’s a sitcom comedy so everyone take it for what it is.  An easy 20 minutes with some decent jokes.  Also I’m just a sucker for Brad Garrett- everything he does is hysterical to me. (ABC and Hulu)

A Million Little Things: The life of a group of friends post one of their friends taking his life.  It’s just as sad as it sounds.  I feel like it’s ABC’s answer to This is Us only with an even more depressing plot if possible.  Look people liked this one, and there is something that happens in the Pilot that kind of traps you into the next one.  This show will either surprise everyone and be incredible or be the absolute biggest piece of shit ever. #tbd #stillgoingtowatch (ABC and Hulu)

New Amsterdam: People really loved this one.  The main character is the husband from Blacklist (totally adorable he just has that weird hot nerd vibe), and it’s a totally ideal premise.  There are so many cheesy turns in the Pilot that would normally make me hate it- but I didn’t.  I’m in for the next episode.  I don’t recommend it seriously, but if you are looking for a decent medical drama with major predictability- this is your jam.

Delusional:
characterized by or holding idiosyncratic beliefs or impressions that are contradicted by reality or rational argument, typically as a symptom of mental disorder.based on or having faulty judgment; mistaken.

the being formally known as Kanye West

I am YE

Late Night part happy and mind numbing and the other makes you want to bash your head through the wall. #america
Jimmy and Chrissy answer Loaded Questions and take shots to avoid giving answers #happy
John Oliver giving a synopsis of what happened this week
#twilightzone