You Can’t Handle the Truth: My Top 11 Guiltiest TV Shows

by Cristina | Last Updated: May 7, 2018

As I’ve mentioned in my previous TV blogs, I may have a bit of a TV problem.  I don’t deny it, and while I used to try to hide just how deep my addiction goes, I have learned to embrace it.  Thrive even.

Since having kids, TV has kind of just been my way to escape the day.  I can sit on the couch and just tune into different stories, and just disappear for a bit.  My husband will vouch for this, and tell you that he wishes I would limit my time to TV that is actually “good” and kind of weed out all the “shit” TV that I watch.  In fact we were having a TV debate recently with another couple we hang out with from time to time. The woman was asking me what I would recommend for them to watch next, and my husband and her husband said my opinion was not valid because I watch everything.  #OffensiveAF

I sat up straight in my chair, latin blood runs too hot for an off the cuff remark like that.  I couldn’t let it fly. I could not stand for that kind of talk. YES! I watch mostly everything, but I can tell the difference between quality television and what I would classify as a guilty pleasure.  I also like to customize my recommendations based on my audience. [I take this entirely too seriously].

Also I feel there is a time and place for a guilty pleasure TV show.  I can’t spend all my free time watching episodes of Game of Thrones, Breaking Bad, or Homeland.  I will die of an early heart attack caused by stress. I just finished the last season of Sons of Anarchy and after a couple of those episodes I seriously questioned who I was, as I was actively rooting for someone to die.  That is just not healthy.

Hence, the guilty pleasure.  The maybe drama filled-mostly light fantasy world where even the worst situation is so ridiculous that it causes you no stress.  It’s just mindless television. Sometimes it’s filled with adorable teen angst and romance, other times it’s filled with intense nonsensical drama, and other times it’s just a good solid laugh.  But it is always guilty and stress-free. Here is my list of my most favorite past and current guilty pleasures:

  1. The entire Bachelor series: This includes but is not limited to The Bachelor, The Bachelorette, The Bachelor Winter Games, and The Bachelor in Paradise.  I was a freshmen in college when the Bachelor first aired, and I have missed one season since. Yes, I know how that sounds. The Bachelor franchise has me in their trap.  But I read once that their demo is 25-54 professional women, so also I’m a cliche.
  2. Unreal: I made a solemn vow to myself never to admit out loud to another soul that I watch this show.  But give me a blog and a few weeks and apparently, there are no secrets. Not only is this show on Lifetime, but it is also about the Bachelor.  Not just the Bachelor, but how the producers behind the scenes create the Bachelor magic. TV magic. So while I went to many great lengths to hide this show from my husband, once he caught me watching it the judgment in his eyes, and in his words, was harsh but probably warranted.  It doesn’t stop me though. It’s so good. In that dirty, telenovela, uncontrollable drama kind of way. The first two seasons are available on Hulu and season 3 started up again on Lifetime, set those DVRs, trust.
  3. Vampire Diaries:  This show has all the ingredients for a great binge.  The cast is gorgeous, high school angst, and vampires (duh).  What else does one even need to thoroughly enjoy television. I have a theory that we as the human species all fall into on of two categories.  We are either Team Stefan or Team Damon. There is no in between. It should be noted that if you are Team Damon, I absolutely positively judge you.  How could you?! If you don’t know which team you are on, clearly you haven’t watched, so RUN to Netflix and thank me later.
  4. The Arrangement:  This is another dirty dirty secret of mine.  It is not with pride that I admit to you that I not only watch this show, but really really like it [insert embarrassed emoji here].  It’s currently in its second season on E. That’s right, E. It is loosely based on the marriage of Katie Holmes and Tom Cruise, and Michael Vaughn from Alias is in it so it MUST be good right?  Honestly I can’t even tell anymore. Is this where we draw the line and officially say I cannot be saved?
  5. Empire: I honestly don’t know how this happened.  I don’t even watch Fox, so I’m not even sure how Cookie and Lucious Lyon walked into my life.  But they didn’t walk they barged their way into my heart. I’m a sucker for the music (which was produced by Timbaland in the first season), I love the flashy clothes, and I just love Taraji P [remember when she gave out cookies then night she won the Golden Globe for playing Cookie watch that here she even gives one to Leo DiCaprio- I mean I love her!]
  6. The OC: I loved it back when it aired, and I loved it more when I re-watched it on HULU last year [stop judging me, I do that enough for both of us].  Adorable young Ryan from Chino gets a chance to live in a pool house and attend school with the beautiful rich kids of the OC. It’s basically THE recipe for really amazing bad TV.
  7. Riverdale: As you are probably starting to notice, teen angst is high on my list of priorities in picking good/bad tv.  Riverdale is no exception. Riverdale is the Riverdale from Archie Comics for all my comic books folk, and so there is the Betty and Veronica thing playing out add in a little murder and the first season (which is on Netflix) you can have binged within two weeks.  Count on it. Second season should be available soon 😉
  8. Buffy the Vampire Slayer: The second vampire show to make the list.  If I was being more honest, there would have been at least 2 others on this list, but I had to show “self-control” and limit it to two.  Sigh, Sarah Michelle Gellar, I wanted to keep her off because my husband had such a crush on her when this was airing, but then again who didn’t? The saga between her and Angel was/still is everything.  I re-watched recently (obviously) and it’s arguably better now. You can catch it on Netflix.
  9. Gossip Girl: I don’t even think I need to explain myself on this one.  New York (upper east side) + Teen Angst + Amazing Fashion + Mysterious Ruthless Blogger= EVERYTHING. Team Blair and Chuck forever  #xoxo
  10. Jane the Virgin: This is my most recent black hole of binging.  In fact I just finished season 1 (in 3 days- it was a weekend and I stayed up late and yes I’m exhausted).  Guys it’s a latin, pregnant, virgin! It’s actually very funny and all I want is to be friends with Gina Rodriguez now.  Catch the first 4 seasons on Netflix!
  11. Hart of Dixie: the little show that could! A NY doctor (Rachel Bilson) moves to Bluebell, Alabama where her dad was from, trying to discover who she is.  Rachel Bilson and Jamie King, who plays a character named Lemon, become archrivals, there’s a crocodile named Burt Reynolds, and there’s this guy Wade who almost never has a shirt on.  I know how this all sounds, but I watched it when it aired, and just rewatched it again, (all together, OBVIOUSLY!) and it was even better the second time. Just love the southern charm and Zoe Hart’s (Rachel Bilson) amazing collection of shorts, you gotta watch if you want to see what I mean.  Catch the whole show on Netflix!